Inside Your Mind: How Your Brain Shapes Your Thinking

Why do we do what we do? What makes us act the way we act? We now know that the basis of all behavior is our brains.   When our brains function a certain way, we function a certain way.  So it is certainly helpful to understand how brains work—specifically in regard to our attention and the different biological forces that act on it.

All working brains swing between being focused sometimes and not focused sometimes? Do you know anyone who is focused all the time? Nope (and I wouldn’t want to).  I also don’t know anyone who is unfocused all the time.  So all of us spend some time focused and other times not focused.  To be clear on what focus is, here’s how your brain sees it.  In any situation, you have a lot of different inputs. For example, in this situation, you are reading this article, but you might also be hearing someone in your household talking or playing music,   or you might be thinking of things you are going to do.   When you are focused, your brain is able to automatically prioritize this article above all the other things.  When you’re not focused, your brain may hop around between the article, the sounds, and the other things you are thinking of. They are all at the same level of priority for you.

There are some complicated neural networks that switch you between focused and not focused that are present in everyone.  But in ADHD, the switch is turned to the “not focused state” too much of the time. Instead of being in the unfocused state a small amount of time, you are spending way too much time unfocused.

Who cares if you are focused? This is a question that I always ask my patients, and often get a quizzical look in return.  Kids usually say: “my mom cares,  my teachers care.”  Adults often say “so I can get things done.”  But I don’t think those are really the right answers.  Let’s talk about what focus does for you.

When your brain is able to prioritize one activity or thought over others, it’s easier to start that activity, stick with it—and finish it.  You often make fewer mistakes, too, if your brain isn’t having to hop around so much.    And—here’s the main point—when you finish something, it’s not the task that’s that important (although it seems so at the time).  The  homework will come and go, the work presentation will be forgotten in time.  It’s not the individual task that’s important.  But  how does finishing something make you feel?

I hope it makes you feel GOOD.  If you can draw the line between finishing something and a good feeling, that is key to developing both better focus as well as self-esteem. Because when you pay attention to that good feeling it makes you feel you can do those kinds of tasks.  It makes you feel like you want to focus on them. Then you accomplish again—feel the good feeling again—and, when this happens repetitively, that’s what self esteem is.  People who are in the focused state more of the time feel this good feeling and build self esteem more of the time.

And if you are in the unfocused state? Everything is about the same level of importance to your brain, and it’s all screaming “pay attention to me!” So your brain starts to do something and then something else pulls it off. Then you hop back to the first thing and then to the third thing. You see and feel everything all at once, and no one item has more importance than the rest. So you are constantly hopping from task to task, input to input.  And therefore it’s harder to start and finish any one thing.  And how does that feel? Not good.  You’re working the whole time—but then you’re exhausted, stressed, and with nothing to show for it. And that negative feeling leads you to say “I can’t do ___” or “everyone has an easier time than me.”  You might start to say “why should I even bother trying?”   Those negative feelings make it harder to focus in the future. People with ADHD are in the unfocused state, and therefore getting more than their fair share of stress and negative self-image, which lead to a harder time focusing, which lead to more negative feelings.

Let’s examine that negative cycle in more detail.  Lack of focus leads to feelings of anxiety and negative self-worth/depression, and when you have those negative feelings it sure is hard to focus.  Why is that?  When you are having negative emotions, a part of your brain called the limbic system is behind that.  The limbic system includes several brain structures deep in your brain, particularly one called the amygdala that really influences emotions a lot.  And, it really takes over your brain.

When the amygdala turns on, unfortunately it turns off the parts of your brain that would otherwise work against it.   It turns off the learning and memory centers of your brain—the rational parts of your brain.  So when you are very upset and your amygdala is on, the parts of your brain that do your rational, focused thinking are off.    So what kind of thinking are you doing? You are thinking in an emotional way.    It might seem real and rational at the time, but your brain is not capable of rational though in the midst of being upset.  Have you noticed that when you think about something and you are feeling upset at the time, you think about it one way. But when you are able to think about that very thing when you are calm, you always think differently about it.  That’ s the difference between your rational brain being off or on.

By the way, although upset seems to take up your whole brain, and it releases stress hormones which flood your whole body, do you know how big your amygdala is? About a cubic centimeter, which is like the end of your finger.  It’s really powerful—and really sneaky to turn off your rational brain.

So you need to know when you are upset that it’s a small bit of your brain working against you. What can you do? Like the little engine that could, you need to fire up your rational brain, but that will only work if you start slowly. You’re capable of simple thinking when you are upset, but not complicated stuff. So start thinking simply.  For some people that is focusing on their breathing, other people might count backward from 3.  As that gets going, your rational brain can start asserting some control over your amygdala and limbic system.  Then you will get back to more focused thinking.

It’s hard to recognize, sometimes, when the sneaky amygdala/limbic system is taking over.  Part of it is recognizing it’s effects on your heart rate, on the tone of your voice, and a different pace to your thought. But if you can recognize when you are upset—name it.  Tell yourself you’re not going to listen to yourself when you are upset.  When you’re able to think calmly then you will pay attention to those thoughts.  If you’re always upset when you wake up at 2 am, then make a rule you’re not going to listen to whatever you’re thinking about at 2 am.  Name it, tame it, don’t flame it. And you can thank the rational parts of your brain for that!